If You Don’t Love It, Don’t Do It

June 29, 2016

If You Don't Love It, Don't Do It

Being an adult is hard, am I right? We’re asked to make decisions that don’t make sense half the time, to think about our future, and to step out in faith. It’s scary, it’s stressful, and sometimes we royally screw it up. There’s no formula to follow to make a right decision, but I’ve begun to believe this mantra: “If you don’t love it, don’t do it.”

Now of course this doesn’t apply in every single decision. I don’t LOVE scrubbing the bathtub, but it has to happen or mold will take over. I don’t LOVE going to the dentist, but I should go if I would like to keep my teeth. I don’t LOVE paying my car registration, but I do love not going to prison, so I (get my husband to) take care of that. Some decisions are a given because they’re necessary. But sometimes, we have a choice.

A few months ago, my husband received an opportunity that would bring in a little extra money. As we discussed this option, I could see that he didn’t want to do this. He could, absolutely. He could have easily done it. But he didn’t want to. He was dreading it and I knew he would be miserable the entire time. We decided that he wouldn’t take that opportunity and prayed that God would open a different door. God was faithful. He opened a door for us, and now my husband is doing something that he enjoys.

Just recently, I had to make a choice. I had to choose whether or not I would continue to be part of a group that I had joined a while back. When I started, I thoroughly enjoyed it, but that had since dwindled. I am able to be a part of this group, and I bring something to the table, but I no longer wanted to be a part of it. Deep down, I could feel that I didn’t love it. After talking it over with my husband, we decided that I would take a break.

We didn’t love those things, so we chose not to do them. I believe that God gives us a lack of desire to show us that we are not called to do that.

In life, there will be hard things that God asks us to do.

Two years ago, God asked me to move out on my own and take a teaching job in a town where I knew virtually nobody. I was scared. As I prayed over this decision, I felt God’s peace. I took the job and it was the best decision for the time.

Almost a year ago, God brought feelings into my heart for the man that was just my best friend. It was terrifying. As I prayed over those feelings, I felt God’s peace. I let Him have control. Three months ago, I married that man, and it was the best decision of all time.

A few months back, God asked me to consider giving up teaching. Unsure of what I would do, I began to pray. I was uneasy. As I prayed for my future, I felt God’s peace. I married my husband and became a homemaker, and it was the best decision for us (read the full story here).

I knew that I needed to do these things because God gave me a desire and a peace. I loved teaching. I love my husband. I love being a homemaker. And through those feelings and desires, God gave me a peace.

When God wants you to take a step, you will know. You may be scared, afraid, or uneasy, but you will also be excited. You will want it, even through the tears and uncertainties. You will feel a peace, even if it is small and seems to be cowering behind your fear. Peace is stronger, because God is peace. And when you have peace, that is when you know.

God will not put you in a position that you hate. It may be a hard job or a position that you didn’t ask for, but that doesn’t make it wrong. If you’re facing a decision, as many of us are, take it to God. If you don’t feel a desire for it, an excitement for it, a love for it, then don’t do it. God has more for you.

What big decisions have you had to make? How did you know that it was the right decision?



  • bequietkate

    June 29, 2016 at 7:06 pm

    This post really resonated with me.

    Two years ago, I enrolled in law school. I come from a family of lawyers so it was pretty much a no-brainer that I’d follow in their footsteps. I did well, but I lacked the excitement that you talked about, the feeling of peace with my decision despite being scared and uneasy. Then halfway into my second year, a got a job offer with the foreign ministry of the country I live in. I was scared about quitting law school – I was REALLY scared – but I was also excited because foreign service was what I originally wanted to when I graduated from college. So I felt all of that, scared, uneasy, afraid, and a dozen other synonyms for fear. But I also felt a measure of peace because I knew that this was what I wanted. So I did it. I quit law school and took the job and I am SO much happier now.

    Thank you for writing this. ♥

    1. abbeylauren4

      June 29, 2016 at 8:21 pm

      Oh, Kate, what a beautiful story! I absolutely relate to your story! I come from a family of educators, so teaching seemed to be the perfect career! Many were surprised when I chose to leave, but it was the absolute best decision for us! 🙂 Thank you so much for sharing!

  • meetruchisharma

    June 29, 2016 at 10:15 pm

    Yours is so similar to my story….loved reading your bit here…i live by this motto too 🙂

    1. meetruchisharma

      June 29, 2016 at 10:23 pm


      Do read my story from the link above…i too took the decision of taking up homemaking fulltime and quit a consulting career….my decision attracted lot of discussions and questions….i cared the least and now love where i am and what i do…love being a homemaker like you 🙂

      1. abbeylauren4

        June 30, 2016 at 9:28 am

        Wow, what a story! I’m glad to hear that your mother is doing better. That couldn’t have been an easy choice to make, leaving your job, but I’m glad that it made you so much happier! God has great plans for all of us, and those look different for everyone! 🙂

        1. meetruchisharma

          June 30, 2016 at 9:52 am

          Absolutely correct…and thanks for reading my post 🙂

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